Let’s face it: Restaurants, food shops, and markets present tremendous opportunities for the mingling of the sexes. While you’re at the butcher checking out rib eyes, a lovely young lady or a handsome young man may catch your eye. Attraction can be elusive, but if you’re prepared with an appropriate pickup line, you might just find your match. Try these epicurean lines, which pair beautifully with their gastronomic environs. Cheese Shop âAre you into affinage? Because Iâd really like to check out your cheese cave.â Butcher shop âHey, you look like youâre in serious need of some tube steak.â Japanese Market âIs that your friend over there? Shiso fine.â Delicatessen âThis pastrami is hot. And so are you.â Middle Eastern Restaurant âTry the fattoush. Itâs amazing. Well, almost as amazing as yours.â Foraging Expedition âIf you really want to get wild, Iâve got some ramps and morels back at my apartment.â Bagel Shop âIâm not into everything bagels. I only want you.â Supermarket âGet outta my dreams. Get into my cart.â* Pastry Shop âThe way you pronounce macaron is so wrong, I donât want to be right.â Cupcake Shop âI have to tell you, you have a fantastic body, even if you have a buttercream face.â Sushi Bar âMiso horny.â Chocolate Shop âWow. This chocolate is orgasmic. And so am I.â Coffee Shop âNormally, I buy whole-bean coffee, but Iâd rather grind with you.â Bar âI like my martinis stirred, not shaken. Just like my clitoris.â Ramen Shop âDo you mind if I slurp your noodle?â Fast-Food Chain âGuess what? Thatâs not the only thing thatâs supersized right now.â Chinese Restaurant âI noticed you ordered the General Tsoâs Chicken, because I have a Major Hard-On for you.â Indian Restaurant âOh, donât eat that. Itâs not raita. I just canât control myself around you.â Spanish Restaurant âYou should take your shirt off. Iâm pretty sure this is a âtoplessâ restaurant, not a tapas restaurant.â French Restaurant âI noticed you ordered the foie gras terrine in aspic. I think we could really gel together.â Ice Cream Shop âNice scoops.â Vegan Restaurant âSoy vey, your ass is tremendous.â Bakery âI canât decide between the ficelle or the baguette. How big do you like it?â Farmers Market âYouâve got some really nice melons. Are they heirloom?â Italian Restaurant âI like my women like I like my olive oil: extra-virgin.â Frozen-Yogurt Shop âMay I taste your Pinkberry?â Vietnamese Restaurant âI donât know whatâs hotter, you or this Sriracha.â Pizzeria âMake that a large with pepperoni delivered to … your apartment.â Wine Shop âAre you into Stelvin closures? Because I totally want to screw you.â Fish-monger âIs that a geoduck clam in your pocket or are you happy to see me?â Cookware Shop Hey, I noticed you were looking at the crock pots. Think of me as a human slow cooker. I can go for hours, baby.â Tea Shop âI usually drink loose tea, but Iâm always down for some teabagging.â Fried-Chicken Joint âThose breasts look delicious. And the chicken doesnât look bad, either.” *Apologies to R&B singer Billy Ocean.
âFrom Comfort Me with Offal, Ruth Bourdainâs Guide to Gastronomy, Andrews McMeel Publishing, LLC